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＊ Read the letter below.
＊ Imagine that you are Takashi, and write an appropriate response to Susan,
＊ Your letter should be around 100 words in length.
Dear Takako,
Hi! How have you been? I’m so busy! I have to write a paper about an interesting part of Japanese culture. I decided to write about sleeping arrangements. Can you help me by answering some questions?
First of all, do you sleep on a bed or futon? I’ve heard that many families sleep in the same room? Do you or do you take have your own room?
In America, most people make their beds in the morning. What do people do with futons in the morning?
I’ve also heard that futons are more comfortable than beds. What do you think?
Thank you so much for taking time to answer my questions!
Your friend,
Carol
Original:
Dear Carol,
Thank you for your letter. I will do my best to answer your questions.
I hope my answers will be helpful to you.
Notes:
I made no corrections here but just wanted to say this was an excellent start to your letter.
Original:
I usually sleep on futon because my room I live now is so small. I fold futon every morning and put it in a closet called “Oshiire”. However when I was living with my parents when I was student, I slept on bed because I have my room. When the children are small, many family sleep together in the same room. I prefer bed because I don’t need to fold it every morning.
I hope this is helpful.
Good luck your report.
Takako
Correction:
I sleep on a futon now because my room is so small. I fold the futon every morning and put it in a closet called “Oshiire”. Every night I take my futon out of the Oshiire and make my bed. However when I was living with my parents when I was student, I slept
on a bed because I had my own room. When the children are small, many families, like mine, sleep together in the same room. A futon is as comfortable as a bed, but I prefer a bed because I don’t need to fold it every morning.
I hope this is helpful.
Good luck with your report.
Takako
Notes:
This part was good in that you answered each of the questions. Good job!
my room I live now is a little awkward. Also, in this kind of letter you need to express
your ideas in as few words as possible. By doing this you have enough words
left to express all of your ideas completely. I cut a few words from the
first sentence to make this more concise and to give you some extra words.
You need the before futon because you are talking about a specific futon, the one you use. Also,
I added a sentence to give a little more information and to show how hard
it is to deal with a futon. This way, it is understandable when you mention
you like beds more.
You need a before bed because you mean one bed. We say have/had my own room. In this case you need had because you are talking about when you were a child. I added like mine to make this sentence more personal. In other sentences you talk about
your family and your experience and in this sentence there was nothing
personal. Even if it is not true you can lieJ
You didn’t quite answer the last question. It is asking you if futons are
more comfortable, not if they are easier to take care of. I added a sentence
commenting on that futons are as comfortable. You could also say Futons are more comfortable because they are soft, but I prefer beds because
you don’t have to fold them. You need a before bed because it is one bed. We say Good Luck with your report or Good Luck on your report.
Comments:
Overall, I think you did a really good job on this. For the most part your grammar was excellent
although you need some work on articles. Another thing to work on is to
try being concise. In a
few places you were wordy, but that was only a few places. Keep up the
good work! |
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